A husband and wife had been married for decades, and to say they didn’t get along would be a massive understatement. Their arguments were local legend, with screaming matches that regularly rattled the neighborhood windows late into the night.
Whenever the husband felt he was losing an argument, he would shake his fist and deliver his ultimate, terrifying threat: “Mark my words! The day I die, I am going to dig my way right out of that grave and haunt you for the absolute rest of your miserable life!”
He took immense pride in the fact that this threat absolutely terrified the neighbors.
Eventually, at the ripe old age of 98, the bitter old man finally passed away. After a somber funeral service, a group of anxious neighbors approached the widow at the wake. They looked around nervously before whispering, “Aren’t you even a little bit worried? What if he actually keeps his promise, digs his way out of the cemetery, and comes back to torment you?”
The elderly widow took a calm sip of her tea, smiled serenely, and replied, “Oh, let him try. I made sure the undertaker buried him upside down. And knowing him, he’ll never stop to ask for directions.”
