Ordering twelve shots of heavy liquor in a single sitting is usually the sign of a massive existential crisis, but for one regular, it was just day one of a three-day family collapse.
A deeply depressed man slumped onto a barstool and looked hollowly at the bartender. “Line ’em up. Give me six double brandies right now.”
The bartender raised an eyebrow, pouring the drinks. “Rough day, pal?”
The man let out a ragged sigh. “You could say that. I just found out my dad is gay.”
The very next afternoon, the exact same man trudged back into the bar, looking even more defeated. Without a word, he signaled for another six double brandies.
The bartender shook his head in disbelief. “Back so soon? What on earth happened today?”
With a heavy, gut-wrenching sigh, the man replied, “I just found out my son is gay, too.”
On the third day, the man practically crawled through the door, looking completely shattered. He pointed to the top shelf and ordered another six double brandies.
The bartender, now genuinely concerned for the man’s liver and sanity, leaned over the counter and whispered, “Jeez, man… does anyone in your entire family actually like women?”
The man downed his first glass in one gulp and muttered:
“Yeah… my wife.”
